Friendship – How To Make & Keep Friends

In a comparison of personal relationships, friendship is considered to be closer than association, although there is a range of degrees of intimacy in both friendships and associations. Friendship and association can be thought of as spanning across the same continuum.

Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:

  • The tendency to desire what is best for the other
  • Sympathy and empathy
  • Honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one’s counterpart
  • Mutual understanding and compassion
  • Trust in one another (able to express feelings – including in relation to the other’s actions – without the fear of being judged); able to go to each other for emotional support
  • Positive reciprocity – a relationship is based on equal give and take between the two parties.

So, how do we make and keep friends ?

First and foremost, We have to learn to be a good friend to ourselves. We become a good friend to ourselves when we learn to love and to accept ourselves just the way we are this moment.
As we grow old we tend to forget what unique, beautiful child of God we are.
Once we are our own best friend, it’s easy to make and keep friends.

In order to keep friends, we have to :

  • Listen to people
  1. Whenever we are talking with someone, including ourselves, pay attention to the words being said.
  2. If we find ourselves replying to their words while they are still talking, we are not listening. Ask them repeat what they are saying.
  3. State back to them what they’ve said, so they know we’ve been listening.
  • Care for the other person
  1. Help our friends as needed by doing things or listening to them
  2. Go out of our way to extend a helping hand to our friend
  3. Do things for our friends.
  • Take an active interest in their life
  1. Ask questions about what they are interested in
  2. get them talking and listening closely to their interests.
  3. Do things together.
  • Are considerate, understanding, forgiving, accepting
  • Look at our friends and cover their backs
  • Be loyal. Stand up for our friends. Don’t let other criticize them.
  • Feel sense of gratitude for our friends and show it.
  1. Thank them for their friendship
  2. Do something special for them that makes them feel special, i.e., make our own birthday card for them and include their picture in it, with words of gratitude you’ve written
  3. Share with others how grateful we are for having such a kind, considerate, caring friends .


Aryani Dian
She love music love to dance, books and movies are the best. She love poems and Haiku :). Diii blog SintaDian contains many inspirations poems & photography.
Aryani Dian

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